Aliens, Bigfoot and Atlantis... With a little bit of Elvis Thrown in.

I just love all the conspiracy nuts on the Internet these days. They seem to think that everything, (and I do mean EVERYTHING) is either a multi layered cover up, or an out-and-out full-blown governmental conspiracy. Granted, there is more than likely SOME shit out there that the government definitely has its hands in, but these nitwits blame everything on the government. Can’t find Bigfoot? Must be a governmental conspiracy. Space aliens kidnapped your dog back in 1963? The government must have covered it up. Can’t find new evidence at Roswell? the government covered it up- (And Bigfoot helped them) the world is all one big conspiracy, wrapped in a riddle, wrapped in an enigma. 

For the money space aliens seems to be the biggest governmental cover up of all, from Roswell to Area 51, we are nothing but mushrooms to them, they keep us in the dark and feed us bullshit and expect us to grow and lead healthy productive lives. Now I have seen the customary “Lights in the sky” but honestly? there was only one time when I wasn't exactly sure, that they were just lights, seriously though? it could have been a lot of things, it was dark out, and I never got close enough to tell what it actually was or could have been. But I’m still not convinced that everything is a cover-up or conspiracy. And so after careful deliberation, after careful consideration, I have formulated, calculated & devised my own theory. I promise, dear reader, this shouldn't take too long.

After meticulously examining the evidence, I have concluded the following, the existence of space aliens is a bunch of Hooey Phooey. (Okay, granted, Hooey and Phooey may not be real words, and you are welcome to look them up at your own leisure.) The reason that they can't find Bigfoot is he moved to the lost continent of Atlantis where he has a time-share with Elvis, Bruce Lee & Amelia Earhart and the only way to get there is to travel by boat into the Bermuda Triangle, through a time warp discovered by Edgar Casey in 1929. But you would have to be a total Ninny to believe in space aliens. 

How about we throw this out there for a theory? if it took our government this long to address the issue of health care in America, And the idiots haven't even scratched the surface of the daily struggle of the mental health crisis, that many American taxpayers live through and deal with on a daily basis, the economy is in the shitter, the world around us is crumbling at the foundations as we speak, so maybe just maybe they don't have time for all of these conspiracies, I think that perhaps when it comes to these types of mysteries? Aliens? Bigfoot? Elvis? The mystery of Atlantis? Yeah, I think we're on our own here, we are after all talking about the government here, Our GOVERNMENT? I think it may come down to what most of us have suspected all along, that they really are as clueless about EVERYTHING as we thought. Hey, it's only a theory. Forgive me for babbling, I probably just need a nap, or coffee, I haven't really decided which yet.